Facebook and Your Relationship

If it wasn't already hard enough to be in a relationship, with the advent of social networking, and most notably Facebook, you can no longer ignore this new element in your relationship.

Facebook is a double edged sword. You can use it to your advantage, but watch out, if you don't use it properly, like Bon Jovi says, it cuts like a knife.

And I would know. I've indulged in relationship status abuse, obsessive stalking, account break-ins, contacting people I shouldn't...I've committed many Facebook crimes and did the time.

So why not just breakup with Facebook? Too hard to do, you're in love! And for all it's faults, Facebook is a great tool to keep in touch. So easy to use and it's like a news aggregator on all the people in your life. How convenient, goss on the go!

Here are some tips to work Facebook and avoid unwarranted conflict (because the last thing you want is to have a fight about Facebook)

NO Relationship Status vs. Relationship Status

• If you decide that special someone is important enough to you that you want to shout on the top of the Facebook mountain that you're with them, ask them to list it in your relationship status.
  
• If you'd rather have some privacy about the most private part of your life, (it also makes things easier if you think you might want to play the field) DO NOT EVER LIST YOUR RELATIONSHIP STATUS!
  
• Make sure that once you make your choice, stick to it. Nobody likes useless inconsistency. Plus, makes you look like a flake.

Making the most of LIKE and COMMENT tools, as well as MESSAGES

• If you're stalking on someone's Facebook, comment! At least LIKE things, it's so easy - it IS just pressing a button.
• Whenever someone goes on their Facebook, it's always nice to see that you're keeping up with them and that you care about what's going on. Great tool to use if its been a little while since you've seen your significant other in a while...or if you couldn't make it out to that party they invited you to.
• And of course, the most intimate and private things should be said through a Facebook message...or why not do a video if you have a web cam. They're fun and shake things up a bit.
  

PDAs - Posting Displays of Affection

• Don't lie, you read the news online everyday. If you find something you think your 'boo' would like, post the link on their wall. It's so unbelievably thoughtful! It shows that you know what they like, you're thinking about them and you want to share something you've experienced (in a limited sense) with them.
• Post nice messages on their wall once in a while. I know, we are all terribly disgusted by PDAs. But you see, romantic messages on peoples statuses and walls are just the viral form of hand holding and kissing in public. So once in a while, gross out the public, but show you care and that you're not afraid to say 'oh so nice' things to them in front of everyone.

Cornify Your Facebook Status Sparingly

• Okay, so you're not into saying super cheesy things in your status name, what's an alternative for you? Put the lyrics of a song that makes you think of someone. It's nice, unique and really personal. On top of that, if any of your friends say 'what's up with the puke-a-rific status,' you can just say it's a Kings of Leon song and still look like a 'man'.
  

Why should you listen to me? I don't have a freakin' degree in relationship psychology, and I'm not going to pretend that I'm an expert.

Everything I say comes from my sensibility, experiences and hours of thought on how I feel about things. And since I am a perpetual relationshiper, this is what I've learned and these are the things I've desired and received rather sparingly, but to much gratitude.

This is how the mind of a woman (at least, an intelligent woman who you can take home to mummy) works. We do like romantic gestures, but sparingly, and catered to the type of person we are. Not so materialistic after all, are we?